Monday, August 26, 2013

The Barrage of Bats

Well, I'm back. I know you missed me. And you know what, I'm hot...and I don't mean sexy. Unless you think I am then I won't stop you from thinking that. It's the start of another semester and at this time of year, Kirksville is steamy. And our house has no air conditioning. It's the sweating-profusely-don't-want-to-move-sticky heat that takes over right before the crispness of fall sets in and cools everything off. And so I, along with my roommates, am struggling not to suffocate from the sweltering temperatures. But this is only the half of it.

We have bats.

Yes, multiple. At least that is what we think. Within the last four days we have had five incidents, sometimes two in one day. Now, I'm pretty darn tolerant with living like, and as, a college student, but this takes it a little too far. Let me take you back...

It all started with me innocently sitting on my bed when I heard a kerplunk. Then out of the corner of my eye a black ball hurled across the room. And then it circled. And swooped. And I freaked out. I crouch run to the living room where my other roommates are studying and cooking and I yell "Bat!".  Sheebs (our house warrior princess) grabbed a broom, a plastic bag, and after a couple gulps of liquid courage and a phone call to some boys, she goes in. The gist is they caught the bat and disoriented it enough to get it away from the house. But that is only the beginning of the perpetual terror we are currently living in.

Since then, the bats have come and gone like it's a truck stop. It's ridiculous really. Like any other group of girls, we scream and run into the other room, not knowing what to do with ourselves. Just tonight I tripped in my attempt to get away from one that zoomed into and across the living room. These dang bats quarantine us to maybe three rooms in the entire house! Bah! All we want is to live in peace. Our landlord better call a batman soon or shtuff is going to go down. That's all I'm saying.

At least for your enjoyment (and we thought it was funny too), here is a video about what to do when you have a bat infestation.